3 Layers of Self-Care Every Modern Mom Needs 

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Mom life can be tough. From what seems like never ending demands from our tiny humans to our house, our husbands, and the community, if we’re not careful, motherhood can quickly turn into a season of burnout instead of a season of bliss.

When I was 1 week postpartum with Brody I posted online about being in a season of newborn bliss. Shortly after, someone commented something along the lines of: “what is this newborn bliss you speak of”?

At first it caught me off guard because although I was tired and exhausted and things were messing and foreign and we were still trying to adjust to this HUGE life change, I couldn’t help but feel so incredibly blessed and blissful in this season of life.

So, Momma, no matter what season of motherhood you are in, whether you’re just now venturing the waters of parenthood or you’re knocking on the door of being an emptynester, remember that choosing to see and experience motherhood as a season of bliss ultimately comes down to your mindset, despite your circumstances.

I never want to be misleading and say that motherhood is easy or that there aren’t challenging moments and experiences, because there most definitely are. Like the time I realized my family would predominately live in Oregon, far away from Alaska. It’s sad to think about not having the option to just pop over to my sister’s house so Brody can play with his cousins or so Jessi and I can have a mom’s night. That’s hard, friends. It’s hard to do motherhood away from people that you love, but I don’t let it steal my joy.

Maybe for you it’s a recent diagnosis in the family or a child throwing MEGA tantrums. Whatever you’re going through, don’t let is steal your joy or your ability to experience motherhood with a mindset of gratitude and thankfulness.

Having this mindset shift ultimately comes down to you being able to have exceptional emotional intelligence (or EQ). To do this, your self-care must be top notch, which is why I’ve broken it down for you in 3 layers that I believe every modern Mom needs in order to cultivate and experience your BEST motherhood!

3 Layers of Self-Care Every Modern Mom Needs:

External:


When I see or hear the word external, I immediately think of things around and outside of me. So, when it comes to your external self-care, think about the the space you’re in. Things like your home, your car, your workspace, or your yard. These are places that you are in often and should give you a sense of peace, joy, and spark creativity and happiness. If they don’t and if you find yourself more overwhelmed then not, then it’s time to make a regular habit out of taking care of your external self-care.

You can do this by writing down the 4 main areas as listed above (home, your car, your workspace, or your yard).. Feel free to add any additional external environments that are meaningful to you! Then, once you list out these external spaces, think about how and what you need to do in order to create more organized, simplified, and productive spaces so you DO feel this joy.

Creating a detailed cleaning schedule (mine can be found in a recent deep dive episode inside our Patreon Community!), cleaning out and de-cluttering your space, and utilizing a good storage system to ensure that everything in your house has a “home” (and things aren’t getting thrown into random places) will be a HUGE blessing to your self-care practice and ultimately to your mindset and motherhood.

If this seems odd to you, that’s totally okay. I thought so too at one point, but then I realized how much of an impact our external environment has on our internal wellbeing. External self-care is a critical piece to your motherhood and should become something you tend to on the regular!

Internal:

This self care level is one that’s probably a little more common to you and one that we can never skip over! Taking care of yourself internally by what you eat, how much water you consume, taking care of your mental, emotional, and spiritual health, and taking time to get out in nature and do things for YOURSELF like passion projects or connecting with friends (outside of regular play dates), is something you should take pride in and continually work at refining so you can keep yourself feeling refreshed, recharged, and ready for the journey ahead.

When I first became a Mom I neglected this portion of my self-care. I was exhausted and didn’t want to cook healthy and started to slip back into some of my old thought patterns of anxiety and fear based thinking. It wasn’t until I started to see the ramifications of this cycle on my motherhood and my mindset that I started to make the shift into pouring back into myself and overtime, I’ve realized that this shift was and continues to be a pivotal piece in showing up as the healthy, happy Mom my children need me to be!

Side note: This is when The Total Postpartum Plan, Blossom After Baby was birthed! If you’re stuck in a Momma rut now, friend- there is hope! I never want you to feel like you’re stuck in motherhood, when in reality, all you need are the tools to help build your steps out. Blossom After Baby is what I created to help myself and thousands of moms get out of the postpartum pit! Learn more about the plan and how it can change your postpartum journey HERE!

Physiological:

Your physiological layer of self care is ALL about how you respond, react, and intentionally think about your days (and ultimately your life). I find it so unfortunate that millions of women show up each day and just roll through the motions of life, almost as if life is just a checkbox on a checklist. Our reactions, responses, and thought patterns seem like they’re out of our control when in reality it’s the exact opposite.  

Take time to acknowledge this level of your self care. A great first place to start is to develop better self awareness of your thought process and mastery over your mental and emotional health. Look for helpful podcasts (Like The Blossoming Mommy And Baby Show!), become a patreon partner (I go deep into episodes, provide 1:1 coaching, and more), immerse yourself into books and biblical teachings that are going to help sharpen these skills, and will ultimately allow you to have a more intentional approach to your thinking, reactions, and responses each and everyday. 

Momma, don’t be misguided by culture’s take on self care today. In reality, as busy moms we can’t all spend two hours meditating in nature with a green tea and post yoga glow... all before 6am………And all the moms gave the haha and eyeroll ;)

So hear my heart, friend. Your self care matters. The way you show up and pour into YOURSELF will have a ripple effect on how you show up and pour into your children, husband, and home.

If this concept of self care is new to you or if you find yourself struggling and overwhelmed with where to even start, I get it! I was there once too but want you to know that no matter where you’re at on your motherhood journey, it’s never too late to start.

Start today.

Start small.

Start with the Blossoming Mommy And Baby 3 step approach utilizing External, internal and philosophical practices of self care and watch how you slowly begin to transform from the inside, out!

Now go pour yourself a fresh double shot espresso with a splash of almond milk, get out of those day old yoga pants, and get after it girl!

Cheering you on, ALWAYS and I’d love to hear what your biggest takeaway was today! Be sure to hop on over to instagram and let me know there!

Xoxo,
Jen

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